LOTS - CARA/DAHLIA

Your Hair Was Long When We First Met

stopstartstall

Title: Your Hair Was Long When We First Met

Author: stopstartstall

Pairing: Cara/Dahlia also implied Cara/Kahlan.

Rating: R

Summary: Cara’s memory flashes become more insistent and Zedd returns.

Spoilers: 2x22 Tears

Words: ~2800

Disclaimer: Follows And The History Books Forgot About Us and I Loved You First. I’m fairly certain this is the last part. All the titles are lyrics from ‘Samson’ by Regina Spektor btw, the song is kind of perfect for C/D.

Your Hair Was Long When We First Met

stopstartstall

Cara stared out of the small window, absolutely still in the darkness of the small room. Her fingers idly slid down the handle of her agiel as her brow furrowed.

They huddled in their cell together when the rats came. Cara hated the rats. When Nathair left them an agiel Dahlia picked it up with trembling fingers and killed the first rat that ventured too close.

Cara shifted slightly and her hand moved towards her stomach and the twisted scar that was hidden under her leather as another memory assaulted her.

The cut wasn’t deep, and Nathair had partially burnt it closed with an agiel anyway but Dahlia still exclaimed when her fingers found it that night and she bent to press kisses to the wound. Cara couldn’t help but feel the pain had been worth it.

Behind her in the bed, Dahlia slumbered on. Cara bit her lip and touched her agiel again. Finally, she left the room without a backwards glance.

* * * * *

Dahlia wasn’t sure where she was when she woke up. She thought she’d fallen asleep in a bare stone room but when she opened her eyes she realised she was in a room in a tavern. Her mind was still fogged by sleep, and the dreams she’d been having; she couldn’t understand why she was alone in the bed. Has Cara been taken for training already? She yawned and came awake a little more, wondering where the thought had come from. “Training?” she muttered to herself, confused.

She yawned again and sat up. She seemed to be coming awake in stages. Slowly, the events of the night before were coming back to her and she smiled to herself as she cast around for her clothes and got dressed. She wasn’t surprised to find Cara gone; it was somehow familiar, just like everything that had happened between them the night before.

She couldn’t shake the feeling that she knew Cara somehow. Little things like the way Cara’s eyes flashed through her or the way the blond held her head when she was thinking made her heart ache in a way that she had no words for.

Fully dressed, she left the room and padded down the tavern stairs. Cara was sitting by the hearth, staring at where the fire should be, deep in thought. She looked up when Dahlia entered and Dahlia saw the quick hint of a smile flash across her face before disappearing. She couldn’t keep the answering grin off her face.

“Morning.” She sunk into a chair next to Cara.

Cara was silent for a moment before she reached across the space between them and gently probed the wound at Dahlia’s forehead. Satisfied that it was healing, her hand dropped and she looked away. “Richard needs my help.”

Dahlia was confused for a moment. Something in the back of her mind bristled at the mention of helping Richard, but it was gone almost as quickly. “The Seeker of Truth can’t build a house alone?”

Cara couldn’t keep the smirk of her face, “No.” She stood up and looked down at Dahlia before looking away again. She looked shy, Dahlia realised, and felt her heart twist again, “I’ll be back later.”

The huntress caught her gaze, “I’ll be waiting.”

* * * * *

Richard set Cara to work chopping wood. She didn’t mind. The work was familiar and easy, and soon her mind drifted to thoughts of Dahlia. Everything around her slowly retreated until she was alone in her mind with the huntress. She knew she was still chopping the wood but it seemed far away somehow and inconsequential.

She was hanging by her wrists in the training room as the agiels burnt her skin. With great effort she turned her head and met the gaze of the girl hanging beside her. Their eyes locked, sharing their secret code to each other. Slowly they both lost their focus as they retreated to the safety of their minds.

She came back to herself with the sun beating down on her back and the axe still in her hands. Richard was staring at her and asking her if she was alright, concern etched all over his face. Cara waved him off and hid her face behind her hair. She felt the stab of tears and angrily blinked them away.

“You always know how to take care of me.”

“We take care of each other.”

Cara dropped the axe and balled her hands into fists at her sides, trying to find her discipline and make this – whatever it was – stop.

Dahlia gasped the first time Cara clumsily pushed her fingers inside of her and gripped Cara’s shoulder hard. Slowly, the blonde moved and Dahlia shuddered, fingers scrabbling for purchase on Cara’s beaten back. With a tenderness she’d almost forgotten, Cara rested her forehead against Dahlia’s and treasured every gasping breath.

When Richard looked up from his work again, Cara was gone.

* * * * *

Dahlia looked up when the door banged open. Cara stood silhouetted by the late afternoon light for a moment before she quickly crossed the room.

“What are you doing to me?” Cara’s voice came out in a broken rush and she stared at Dahlia fiercely, clearly expecting some sort of answer.

“What do you mean?” Dahlia was truly bewildered. This was a very different Cara to the one she’d seen before, though somehow, no less familiar.

“I keep seeing – you. Only it’s not you. It can’t be you. You’re in my memories.” The last part came out like an accusation, all angry and hard and Dahlia felt something rise up in her to meet it.

“You’re in mine.” Dahlia was on her feet now, matching Cara and trying to stare her down.

“But you weren’t there!” Cara’s hand moved to grip the handle of her agiel, her knuckles whitening as they tightened around the handle. Her hand twisted once and then she seemed to deflate, the anger leaving her voice, “You don’t know what they did to me.”

Dahlia stared at her for a long moment before she stepped closer and tried to take Cara’s hands in her own. The blond pulled her hands away in frustration and hugged herself, suddenly small. “You weren’t there,” she repeated only she wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince the other woman or herself. She swallowed and then met Dahlia’s eyes, “Why weren’t you there?” The words were barely a whisper but Dahlia heard them.

Slowly, Dahlia reached across the space between them and gently raised a hand to cup Cara’s face. Their eyes met and they stayed like that for what seemed like a long time, until the door opened behind them and Cara stepped away quickly, eyes downcast and searching for something else to look at.

Dahlia turned to see a tall old man staring at her with a shocked expression on his face. His eyes swept over to Cara and he seemed to go even paler. His fingers twitched and he started to raise an outstretched hand towards her, slowly as if she might startle. Dahlia stood as if transfixed, trying to make sense of what was happening.

“Zedd?” Cara spoke from behind her, confusion evident in her voice. Dahlia watched as the man’s hand rose to chest height and his fingers twitched again. There was no mistaking the menace in his eyes now, and Dahlia took an involuntary step backwards.

“Wizard?” Cara’s voice had taken on a protective edge. “What are you doing?” Dahlia felt herself being pulled backwards and behind the Mord’Sith. “Have you lost your mind?”

“What is she doing here?” Zedd’s voice was cold, and Dahlia couldn’t imagine what it was she’d done. Then, quieter, “Why aren’t you in Stowcroft?”

“Stowcroft?” Cara glanced back over her shoulder. “You’re from Stowcroft?”

Dahlia stared at her for a moment and then her eyes widened, “Cara – Cara Mason?”

Cara nodded once, and then realisation dawned on her face, “We were at school together. That’s why I know you.” Even as she said it, they both heard the lie.

“You know each other?” Zedd still held his hand out, but he seemed less inclined to blast them with Wizard’s Fire than he had been a moment before.

“No.” The two women exchanged a glance. Cara shook her head and then sighed, “Yes. I remember things,” she paused and more gruffly added, “Things that never happened.”

Zedd cursed and dropped his hand, then started to pace around the room and mutter darkly to himself. Cara caught the words ‘spell’ and ‘fate’ and her eyes narrowed, “What do you know about this Wizard?”

Zedd stopped and looked at her. He ignored her question, “What are you to each other?” He demanded suddenly, his eyes sweeping over them again as though he could find the answer if only he looked hard enough. He resumed his pacing and this time Cara was certain she caught the words ‘Leo’ and ‘love.’ She bristled, “Will you talk to us instead of muttering to yourself!”

Zedd stopped and turned to face them, he stepped closer and pointed to Cara. “Tell me what you remember!”

“Nothing – I…. Mord’Sith things,” she stammered uncomfortably.

“We were captured together, protected each other.” Cara turned to stare in shock at the huntress. There was a faraway look in Dahlia’s eyes. “We were Mord’Sith together.”

Zedd had gone pale again. “And?”

Dahlia raised her chin defiantly, it was a look Cara knew well though she was sure she’d never seen it before, “We loved each other.”

Zedd snorted softly to himself. “Mord’Sith aren’t capable of love.” His eyes softened slightly as he took in Cara and she looked away self consciously. He turned back to Dahlia, eyes hard again, “You weren’t capable of love. You betrayed her. You captured Cara and took her to Darken Rahl. You tortured her and eventually, when she wouldn’t break, you used powerful black magic to turn Cara against us.”

Dahlia’s eyes had gone wide at the Wizard’s words. She couldn’t remember any of that and from the way Cara was looking at her Dahlia knew she didn’t either, “Why don’t we remember this?”

“I did a spell to undo what you’d done to her.” Zedd paused, “There were unintended side effects.”

“’Unintended side effects?’” Cara growled his words back to him, anger plain in her voice. “Like forgetting we ever knew each other?”

“The Spell worked by making it so that Dahlia had never been a Mord’Sith. That way she would never be able to betray you.”

Cara stared at him then her voice went low, dangerous, “You have no idea what you took from us, Wizard.”

“You’d already been taken from. I gave you your life back. If it wasn’t for me you’d still be in the grip of Rahl’s magic!”

Dahlia couldn’t believe the Wizard’s arrogance; she might not know the whole story but she knew enough to know it mattered. She’d had impressions of what Cara had been through, she didn’t understand them all but she’d seen enough to know the untold suffering she’d faced and thanks to this man she’d been through that alone.

While she knew being a hunter was a much easier life than being a Mord’Sith, she was starting to realise that being without Cara wasn’t.

“You said I betrayed her,” Dahlia’s voice was small but she had to go on, “Why?”

“Darken Rahl ordered you to. He wanted Cara back under his power.”

Cara was looking away from them now, and started tugging on the ends of her hair. Dahlia had to go on, “What did I do?”

“You lured Cara away from us and then captured her and tortured her. She wouldn’t break. Rahl had to use black magic to control her.” He glared at Dahlia, “Sometimes you brought food to my cell. You boasted that you were protecting Cara from her weakness and soon she’d be back where she belonged.”

Cara was standing ramrod straight, hands balled at her sides. She didn’t know where to look, but Dahlia could see the emotion in her eyes. Zedd turned to face her, “You can’t trust this woman, Cara!”

Cara’s eyes flickered between them and one of her hands moved across to grip her agiel. Her eyes lingered on Dahlia for a moment and Dahlia was sure she saw an apology in them.

Without a word, Cara turned and left. Dahlia let out the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding. Zedd stepped into her line of vision, “Now leave,” he hissed and followed Cara out of the door.

Alone, Dahlia sank into a chair by the fire and brushed fiercely at the tears that threaten to escape.

* * * * *

“I want to leave.”

Kahlan shielded her eyes from the sun and looked up at Cara before her. Kahlan wasn’t sure she’d ever seen the Mord’Sith look so uncomfortable. It was an unsettling sight.

“But Richard is still helping the town rebuild,” Kahlan knew better than to ask the obvious question of why Cara wanted to leave.

Cara shifted her weight to the side and rolled her eyes, “Don’t you think the Seeker has more important things to do than help some backwater town rebuild itself?”

“Whatever Richard thinks is important is important,” Kahlan replied simply. She studied the Mord’Sith for a moment, “Cara, what’s this about? Is it that…. woman?”

Cara met her eyes sharply, “It’s got nothing to do with her.” The words came out in a rush, and Kahlan could almost see Cara wishing she hadn’t said them.

Kahlan was silent for a moment and Cara couldn’t understand the look in her eyes, “Who is she?”

Cara turned away to leave and then stopped, “She’s no–one. Not anymore.”

* * * * *

Dahlia hadn’t moved from her chair by the fire. Every time the door opened she turned to it hoping Cara would be standing there but she never was. She hoped Cara would come back. She couldn’t leave, not now. She couldn’t give up on Cara. Again, part of her mind whispered, You can’t give up on her again.

She fiddled with the knife on her belt absentmindedly, her thoughts full of the Mord’Sith.

”I will come back to you. We’ll see each other again soon.”

Dahlia stiffened at the half remembered memory and stood up. She had to find Cara. On her way out she nearly walked into someone coming the other way. She looked up into a vaguely familiar face. “I know you.”

“Kahlan,” the brunette said. “I’m Cara’s friend.” Something about the way she said ‘friend’ sounded odd to Dahlia’s ears. Before she could think on it too much, Kahlan went on, “And you’re…?”

“Dahlia. Where’s Cara? I need to find her.”

Kahlan looked away, clearly uncomfortable, “I don’t know where she is.”

Dahlia studied her for a moment, “Yes you do.” Kahlan glanced at her then looked away again. Dahlia grabbed her arms, “Where is she?” She searched the other woman’s eyes, “Please,” she added, “I need to find her.”

Something seemed to go out of Kahlan, “She’s in the town square.” She grabbed the other woman suddenly, “You’re not going to hurt her, are you?” There was a threat in Kahlan’s eyes and Dahlia felt something ominous lurking below the woman’s surface.

“Never,” Dahlia answered immediately. Never again, she added silently.

Kahlan watched her go, her expression unreadable.

* * * * *

Cara was chopping wood when she heard someone approaching her. Richard had long since retired to the tavern, Zedd was avoiding her and she didn’t know where Kahlan was. It had to be the huntress. She concentrated on the swing of the axe, trying to avoid thinking. Every time she lost control of her mind Dahlia’s face appeared before her eyes.

“Cara?” It was Dahlia’s voice. Cara’s hands tightened around the axe handle, but she didn’t stop her work or turn around. “Cara?” Dahlia’s voice was more insistent this time.

Cara swung her axe again, harder this time, “What?”

“I should be sorry.”

Cara almost stopped her work, “Why?”

“I should be sorry that I can’t stop thinking about you.” Dahlia’s voice was as vulnerable as Cara had ever heard it, in real life or memory. It should have been enough to remind her that this wasn’t the woman she had known, the woman Zedd had taken from her. Cara tried to fix that thought in her mind but it was replaced by images of the other woman in places she’d never been. Cara squeezed her eyes shut.

“I should be sorry that I know you somehow. I should be sorry that all this is so familiar to me.” Dahlia paused, “But I’m not.” She wanted so badly to reach for Cara but she hugged herself instead, “Please don’t leave.”

Finally, Cara’s hands slowed and the axe sunk to the floor, “Dahlia….”

Cara turned then and she wasn’t sure who was reaching for who first but she found herself kissing Dahlia, hard and wanting, and it felt right somehow, familiar. Dahlia pulled away, “I don’t remember everything that happened.”

Cara rested her forehead against Dahlia’s, “Let me tell you.”

“Later,” Dahlia said, leaning into Cara again, “Tell me later.”

~ ~ ~